It's been a while.

I am thinking now a little about focus. I saw this video a while ago about this world-class bassist who had a teacher that instilled in him the following idea: if you don't know what you did yesterday, what you're doing today, and what you're doing tomorrow to get better at the bass, you are unfocused. Something like that. It was more eloquent than that.

And reflecting on that in my life, I think I am a bit unfocused. I mean, compared to how I once was, I definitely have more commitment, and am making progress towards my goals. But I think there's also room for improvement.

I often feel like I don't make the best decisions for myself. What I mean is that I will have a goal: maybe it is to finish up all my homework before the weekend. And then I'll have these moments where I really could manifest that goal into reality. It is as simple as just taking my laptop out and browsing moodle. And even though this decision is logically the one that will benefit me the most, I'll instead fiddle around with my guitar or watch YouTube shorts. Obviously this isn't an "exclusively me" problem, it's the ubiquitous affliction known as procrastination.

I don't think beating myself about the past really helps me. But I do think there's a lot of growth I can make if I just actively participate in my life by making good decisions for myself. It's so simple, but what if I really stuck to my plans? I think spontaneity and impulsivity is awesome, but I also think it's worthwhile to explore what it is like to manifest your dreams into a reality – one action at a time.


Mind Straw #15: September Twenty Three, 2023